r/AskReddit 5d ago

You can have 5000 of anything that starts with Y. What do you choose?

10.1k Upvotes

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3.2k

u/Designer-Pound6459 5d ago

5000 yellow gold bars please.

1.2k

u/Corvo_Attano_451 5d ago

5000 yellow painted Lockheed Martin F 22 Raptors

708

u/bard329 5d ago

If you suddenly had 5000 Yellow F22's you'd be spending 5000 Years in Guantanamo

334

u/BristolBomber 5d ago

Pfft... You gotta get me first... Ive got a fleet of 5000 yellow F22s!

72

u/bard329 5d ago

But you can only pilot one at a time. Oh, and also, can you pilot one?

69

u/PM_ME_YOUR_CUCUMBERS 5d ago

Here's to you for bringing the realism to a hypothetical question

9

u/Petermacc122 5d ago

It's a reasonable question. Hypothetically if you had 5,000 f22's in yellow you'd be arrested. The planes confiscated. And then either repainted or scrapped for parts. Why? Because EVERYONE wants the f22. Including "article 5" Poland. You don't just magically get the words most advanced fighter jet without someone in the government telling you no.

11

u/bard329 5d ago

Countries are waiting years for like 12 F22's and this guy suddenly has 5000 of them? Sus.

6

u/Petermacc122 5d ago

Yeah the US government won't even lease them yet. They're too advanced.

1

u/bard329 5d ago

Ah yes, you're right. The F35's are on order. No one else has F22's.

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1

u/Longjumping-Jello459 4d ago

Also they are planned to be phased out in the early 2030s assuming the new plane that's been in development comes on line as planned at that time. Also we have like 130-150 total including trainer versions.

3

u/PM_ME_YOUR_CUCUMBERS 5d ago

Hypothetically you do because hypothetically, if I had 5000 f22s, I'd have one plane with the power of 5000 f22s :D

2

u/Petermacc122 5d ago

Technically if you get Uber cool. Invent in your brain a self sustaining outer space ark capable of defending itself from stuff and surviving in space with all the manuals to work it. Just make the class babe start with a y. Then you can literally save humanity with outer space arks.

29

u/surnik22 5d ago

I bet I could pilot it once and briefly

1

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[deleted]

2

u/N0madicaleyesed 5d ago

It's all about confidence baby, play it cooool and smooooth

6

u/BristolBomber 5d ago

I reckon i could do it at least once.. duration unknown

Just give me 10 minutes and access to YouTube.. im Sure i can work something out.

They aren't taking me alive... That's for sure!

-1

u/bard329 5d ago

You aren't taking yourself alive either, tho....

4

u/BristolBomber 5d ago

thatsthejoke

0

u/bard329 5d ago

*yeaigotthat*

3

u/theserial 5d ago

I might be able to get one off the ground. Now how far off the ground or in what condition it returns to the ground in is another story.

2

u/Gwolfski 5d ago

Taking off is the easy part. Landing is hard ;)

3

u/IWannaFuckABeehive 4d ago

Fortunately after I eject I still have 4,999 more tries assuming the ejection doesn't leave me crippled

1

u/Gwolfski 4d ago

Good point! XD

2

u/Longjumping-Jello459 4d ago

Indiana Sr and Indiana Jr conversation comes to mind.

1

u/Loading_User_Info__ 5d ago

Not yet but I've got 4999 tries to figure it out.

1

u/I_dont_know_you_pick 5d ago

I'm sure by the 2000th one or so you'd get the hang of it.

1

u/bard329 5d ago

I wonder what kind of automatic systems there are to eject....

1

u/Geawiel 5d ago

Forget that. Where the fuck you gonna keep them?

1

u/bard329 5d ago

Probably gotta build some kinda bat cave that fits 5000 jets

1

u/PM_UR_Beefy_Curtains 5d ago

You cant? Lol

1

u/The-very-definition 5d ago

Just daisy chain them to some remote control drone software. If this isn't already a thing installed in our modern fighters I'd be pretty surprised. :p

1

u/swooosh47 4d ago

Would probably have to utilize the eject button on the first 50 or so

1

u/La_Saxofonista 4d ago

Tie them all together like Kerbal Space Program

1

u/Live_Astronaut3544 4d ago

I think all it would take are a few posts of you 5k raptors and a call to arms for free f22 flight time and you could have an army. Probably a kamikaze army because at that volume idk that you could really vet each candidate.

3

u/t3hjs 5d ago

Probably need 5000 Youthful pilots for them

2

u/BristolBomber 4d ago

Youthful?.. i plan to staff with geriatrics wgo are mad at the world!.

1

u/Mongoose42 5d ago

YOU’RE POWERLESS TO STOP ME NOW, GREEN LANTERN! MUHUWAHAHA!!

1

u/ze11ez 5d ago

LMAOOOOOOOO go Bristol GO!!! Can I have one please? I have 5,000 years under my belt I can give you a few to use

1

u/BristolBomber 4d ago

Your in.. welcome to the fleet!

1

u/OwOlogy_Expert 5d ago

And no fuel or runway or pilots for them...

1

u/MrWeirdoFace 4d ago

Yeah but who's going to fly them?

2

u/MisterPeach 5d ago

Just find 5000 pilots willing to fight in your personal Air Force and they’ll have a hard time catching you. That’s some serious firepower that could take out most national armies with ease. At the very least the US government would have a huge headache and a massive war on their hands if they come after you for 5000 top of the line fighter jets.

3

u/bard329 5d ago

Only less than 200 F22's built so far, so finding 5000 pilots shouldn't be too difficult.

Google says as of last december, there's a total of 290 F22 pilots in the Air Force

1

u/consider_its_tree 5d ago

Nice beaches though, you might even see light from one streaming through the cracks in your cell

1

u/h3fabio 5d ago

Come take em

1

u/MysteriousConcert555 5d ago

Them's big words for someone not in a yellow-painted Lockheed-Martin F22 Raptor

2

u/bard329 5d ago

How do you know I didnt comment elsewhere in this thread with something like "5000 yellow painted Battlestar Galacticas"?

Checkmate.

2

u/MysteriousConcert555 5d ago

How do you know I didn't comment elsewhere in this thread with something like "5000 Yellow Uno reverse cards"?

Check-checkmate

1

u/PM_ME_UR__ELECTRONS 5d ago

So I get one and spend one year.

Worth it?

1

u/spacesticks 5d ago

Hey, why don't I just go eat some hay, make things out of clay, lay by the bay? I just may!

1

u/Morganross 5d ago

If you have one yellow f22 that's your problem. but if you have 5,000 f22s that's someone else's problem now

5

u/hobbseltoff 5d ago

5000 Yellow Fighter Jets of Jesus

9

u/Designer-Pound6459 5d ago

Trade ya half for half.

3

u/Raigne86 5d ago

My husband sees your f-22s and raises you 5000 YF-12s.

I have no horse plane in this race.

3

u/_Ganon 5d ago

The "yellow" descriptor is definitely a meta for this. I'll take 5000 yellow wallets that each contain $1000.

1

u/BonnieMcMurray 5d ago

You're thinking way too small.

I'll take 5000 yellow wallets that each contain a cashier's check for $1 billion.

2

u/Famous_Profile 5d ago

IRS coming fo yo ass after you cash in the first one

3

u/ajg3199 5d ago

Sorry, they only made 183 and you couldn't afford a production restart for the rest of them.

1

u/BonnieMcMurray 5d ago

It's "you can have 5000 of anything that starts with Y." Not "you can have 5000 of anything that starts with Y, subject to the limitations of industrial production and your ability to afford it".

We're talking about instantaneous wish fulfillment.

2

u/deceitfulninja 5d ago

I feel like you'll just be arrested and executed for treason with that wish.

3

u/DutchJediKnight 5d ago

Not really, but they'd be confiscated

1

u/deceitfulninja 5d ago

A private citizen somehow procuring 5000 essentially WMDs full of top secret government technology? Go ahead and take that gamble, friend.

1

u/hydrosalad 5d ago

You’re assuming they’re American. The real hilarity would ensue if it’s a Chinese or North Korean granted that wish

1

u/MembershipFeeling530 5d ago

Who the hell you going to sell those to

3

u/BonnieMcMurray 5d ago

I'll barter with Pepsi, then sell the soda.

1

u/No_Carry_3991 5d ago

oooohh yes. What about the Thunderbird LOL I already know snort. no.

1

u/Watchfella 5d ago

5000 yellow painted B-2s, which are worth more than their weight in gold

1

u/Dull_Half_6107 5d ago

That sounds like a problem for whoever suddenly has their hands on 5000 F22s

1

u/MrHyperion_ 5d ago

Trying to sell those would be a nightmare

1

u/Roozyj 5d ago

Googling this, hoping it's a dinosaur... nope, it's an airplane. Still cool, but imagine 5000 yellow painted dinosaurs!

1

u/100percent_right_now 5d ago

5000 yellow suns. We playing force escalation today?

1

u/Ethendl 5d ago

Or how about 5000 YF-23 fighters jets?

1

u/ObamasBoss 4d ago

Cool, the radar paint doesn't work anymore. And congress won't let you sell them.

14

u/tomqvaxy 5d ago

I’m voting this should be accepted as gold is indeed graded by color in jewelry. Other choices being white, champagne, rose, etc.

2

u/Designer-Pound6459 5d ago

Thank you.

2

u/tomqvaxy 5d ago

lol cheers

97

u/connorgrs 5d ago

This feels like cheating

176

u/ForayIntoFillyloo 5d ago

The super wealthy have no qualms about cheating. It's time others joined in.

44

u/Dakotareads 5d ago

If you're not cheating, you're not playing hard enough.

3

u/Legionodeath 5d ago

ABC

Always be cheatin

4

u/TenderShenanigans 5d ago

I have the feeling the owner of a tow truck business is reading that and saying "Fuck yeah" while the super wealthy never reddit and are saying "We will solve global warming with famine and war then enslave the survivors. Do you want to ride it out in a bunker or a space station?"

The tin foil hat keeps the sun out of my eyes.

-1

u/b0rtbort 5d ago

it's adorable that redditors think they'll elicit any meaningful change by whinging about billionaires ad nauseum

2

u/TenderShenanigans 4d ago

Isn't it? Thank you for understanding that the call to action I was responding to would only reach local shitheels who already are cheating while the people they bitch about don't give a fuck. Some people would get distracted by the conspiracy theory and think that was the point.

21

u/Jceggbert5 5d ago

Ain't nobody want rose gold bars

2

u/RoadDoggFL 5d ago

I bet a lot of people actually would...

16

u/Parishdise 5d ago

I feel like it only counts because yellow gold is technically a type of gold

5

u/AccessProfessional37 5d ago

5000 yellow painted cardboard boxes with $1,000,001 in each box

3

u/Arkyja 5d ago

Just one yellow omnipotence please

3

u/Snake_fairyofReddit 5d ago

No bc there’s white gold and rose gold so yellow gold is valid

2

u/spikernum1 5d ago

Yellow universes

8

u/PmMeYourNiceBehind 5d ago

Depending on what size/weight of gold bar you are referring to, that would be worth $11.76mil to $1.17bil

9

u/Designer-Pound6459 5d ago

Ok. That works.

5

u/bigev007 5d ago

Is there a market for ytterbium?

3

u/OverlappingChatter 5d ago

We never let this count in scategories. The noun had to start with y.

8

u/Designer-Pound6459 5d ago

5000 yards of 24K gold rope.

3

u/T33FMEISTER 5d ago

They are all yellow gold plated iron.

3

u/Autski 5d ago

Technically, 1 gram is considered a "bar" and would net you around 371k for 5,000 of them.

But I think you meant 1kg gold bar which would be closer to 371 million

3

u/PenisSmellMmm 5d ago

Anything yellow doesn't fall under the category, unfortunately. Almost everything can be yellow to some extent, which means you can wish for anything.

Wish denied.

3

u/Designer-Pound6459 5d ago

Excuse me. Yellow gold is totally a thing. It's not painted or somehow 'made' to be yellow.

2

u/PaleoShark99 5d ago

I thought the same thing

2

u/Soon2BProf 5d ago

I was going to say this but rather Yukon Gold bars from the Klondike gold rush lol.

2

u/DigNitty 5d ago

5000 yellow cake uranium’s

3

u/AddlePatedBadger 5d ago

A gold bar weighs 12.4kg. So you would have 62 tons of gold.

The total gold ever mined is about 244 tons. So you would own 20-25% of the world's gold supply, depending on whether the gold came out of nowhere or was taken from someone else.

3

u/wiziwig 5d ago

gold About 244,000 metric tons of gold has been discovered to date (187,000 metric tons historically produced plus current underground reserves of 57,000 metric tons).

2

u/AddlePatedBadger 5d ago

Samsonite! I was way off.

1

u/Error_050 5d ago

5000 5000kg gold bars

1

u/surpriserockattack 5d ago

I had a similar thought except each gold bar is 100 kilograms lol

1

u/TableWrong8118 5d ago

Nah bro I want blue gold bars 🤣

1

u/TheMightyKickpuncher 5d ago

Oh we can just cheat by adding adjectives up front? Fine. 5000 yellow Yvonne Strahovski(s), please!

1

u/chengstark 5d ago

Ok we found the solution, yellow everything.

1

u/Ku-xx 5d ago

Just make sure your sneak is maxed out so you can make it past Elijah

1

u/rucorosa 5d ago

1 kilo each please

1

u/No-Philosophy5461 5d ago

Congrats on your new investment! Here is 5000; 1 gram; yellow gold bars. 🧞‍♂️

1

u/Designer-Pound6459 5d ago

Awesome that's $370,000+ more than I have now.

1

u/Thomasina_ZEBR 4d ago

5000 yards of yellow gold bars please.

1

u/TheLastZimaDrinker 4d ago

DISQUALIFIED